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What Happens If Your Household Staff Need to Take An Extended Time Off?

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In any workplace, life events like bereavement or illness can arise unexpectedly, and the world of household staffing is no exception. For the discerning families that we work with at My Household Managed, having a plan in place can make these transitions smoother for everyone involved. Providing clear and compassionate leave options during personal or family crises is an essential part of fostering a respectful and loyal working relationship and key to attracting and retaining the highest-calibre staff.

Whether your staff need a few days, few weeks or even a few months off, here’s a guide to managing bereavement leave, parental leave, and other critical time-off policies for private staff, along with why consulting an attorney to formalize these policies is vital for compliance and fairness.

How to Support Your Household Staff Through Bereavement

Bereavement leave refers to time off provided to staff after the loss of a loved one, allowing them to grieve and make necessary arrangements. It can be an incredibly difficult time to navigate and so establishing clear guidelines will give employees time and space to grieve, whilst also maintaining the protocols that you need to ensure minimal impact to the everyday running of your household. Managing these moments with empathy and structure will not only support your staff but also strengthen your reputation as an employer of choice.

Close Family vs. Extended Family

There is a clear distinction to be made depending on who your employee is grieving. Different levels of closeness can impact the amount of paid time off that your employee might receive.

  • Close Family: For immediate family members (parents, siblings, spouse, or children), offering at least 3 to 10 days of leave is common. This time allows for attending funerals, managing estate matters, and grieving.

  • Extended Family: For extended relatives (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins), 1 to 3 days is usually appropriate. Additional unpaid leave may be considered if travel or other arrangements are required.

Cultural Sensitivity in Leave Policies

Different cultures and religions deal with death in a variety of ways. For instance, some cultures observe mourning periods lasting several weeks, while others may have specific ceremonies requiring time off. We always advise an open line of communication between you and your staff. Recognizing and accommodating diverse cultural practices around mourning builds trust and respect between you and your staff.

Our Recommendation:

Work with your attorney to create a bereavement leave policy tailored to your household, ensuring it complies with state and federal laws.

How to Create a Compassionate and Fair Parental Leave Policy for Household Staff

Life’s unexpected moments, such as welcoming a new baby or caring for a sick child, require thoughtful parental leave policies. These situations often arise in private households and call for a balance of empathy and structure.

Parental Leave for Sick Children

If an employee’s child becomes seriously ill, offering short-term leave (3 to 5 days) ensures they can focus on their family. In more serious cases, extended unpaid or partially paid leave demonstrates compassion. Similarly, there may be the need for flexibility if your employee’s child becomes sick at school, or requires medical care. Occasionally, time off may be provided on an ad-hoc basis, depending on the situation.

Maternity/Paternity Leave

Maternity leave is a cornerstone of parental leave policies, enabling staff to focus on their growing families while maintaining household continuity. When working for any corporate company, there is a basic expectation of maternity or paternity leave and so if you want to be a competitive employer, having a clear maternity/paternity policy can set you apart. For more specific information on maternity leave policies, read our blog on maternity leave for nannies.

You may also want to consider including adoption leave or leave for fertility treatments in your parental leave policies.

Long-Term Illness or Injury Leave

Long-term illness or injury leave may be necessary for your staff if they, or a family member, experience a serious health issue that requires extended recovery. Providing clear guidelines on eligibility and duration ensures everyone is on the same page. Establishing a framework for these situations minimizes disruptions while showing your support.

Points to Consider:

  • Define eligibility for long-term leave based on tenure and performance.

  • Clarify the balance between paid and unpaid leave options.

  • Communicate openly about expected duration and return-to-work plans.

How to Approach Leave Conversations

Sensitive topics like bereavement or illness require tact and understanding. Here’s how to navigate these discussions effectively:

  • Be Proactive: Introduce leave policies during the hiring process to set clear expectations.

  • Listen: Allow your employee to explain their situation without judgment.

  • Offer Solutions: Be flexible, whether through unpaid leave, part-time options, or temporary staffing arrangements.

For example, when a long-time housekeeper needs a few weeks off to care for a sick family member, offering flexibility—such as paid time off for a portion of the leave or the option to return part-time—can demonstrate support while maintaining household continuity. Similarly, allowing your nanny to attend a family wedding abroad or your chauffeur to attend a child’s graduation can set you apart as an employer who truly values the welfare and personal lives of your staff.

Private household employees value workplaces that demonstrate genuine care and consideration. Supporting staff during challenging times not only strengthens employer-employee relationships but also enhances the household's overall functionality.

Why Formalizing Leave Policies Matters

A clear, written leave policy ensures fairness, compliance, and transparency. Employees feel valued when their personal challenges are acknowledged, and households benefit from smoother operations during absences. To make sure that your policies are in line with state and federal requirements, My Household Managed recommends working with an attorney.

How an Attorney Can Help:

  • Draft legally sound employment agreements that include leave provisions.

  • Advise on state-specific and federal regulations.

  • Provide guidance on tax implications for paid leave.

For legal advice, consult with a qualified employment attorney to ensure compliance with all relevant laws.


At My Household Managed, we understand the importance of compassionate and legally sound leave policies. Whether you’re navigating a bereavement leave request, parental leave, or long-term illness, our expertise ensures your household continues to run smoothly while prioritizing fairness and respect.

Find your next house manager, nanny or estate manager with My Household Managed whether you’re looking for temporary staffing solutions or a longer-term replacement to ensure your household runs seamlessly even during absences.


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